Since I succumbed to burnout and have been making the necessary changes, I’ve become very attune to my feelings – what tires me and what gives me energy. I realize how precious my energy is.
After 14 months off work, my physical energy still comes and goes. There’s the rare day – still very rare, unfortunately – that I almost feel like myself. There are days that I am fairly energetic when I wake up then crash by noon. There are days where I get absolutely nothing accomplished. Oh and my social calendar? It’s pretty empty. There are lots of people I want to get together with, but simply can’t.
This burnout is one of the most frustrating and humbling experiences of my life. I’m fiercely independent but in this state, I’m forced to rely on others for tasks I would normally have completed easily. I hate asking hubby Chris for help with basic technology problems, or to be my memory when I can’t recall names, events or situations. I detest counting on my family doctor and therapist to provide reports to my insurance company verifying the accuracy of my progress. I hate relying on a stipend of my usual pay. I despise it all. And that is bad energy that I tamp down on a daily basis.
Forgive me if I get cranky when someone makes an uneducated comment about burnout because unless you’ve lived it, you have absolutely NO idea what you’re talking about. Burnout is debilitating. This has brought me to my knees, and does so on a continuous basis. I have vowed more empathy to others who may be struggling, especially if it’s a situation with which I’m not familiar. …
Forgive me if I get cranky when someone makes an uneducated comment about burnout because unless you’ve lived it, you have absolutely NO idea what you’re talking about. Burnout is debilitating. This has brought me to my knees, and does so on a continuous basis. I have vowed more empathy to others who may be struggling, especially if it’s a situation with which I’m not familiar. …
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