My husband Chris loves peanut butter with an enthusiasm paralleled only by his love for his classic car.  He slathers the all-natural manna from heaven on his toast, bread, crackers, cookies…also the kitchen counter, cupboards, and doors.  

He’s a guy who would happily eat the same thing day in and day out for years – decades, to be honest.  Somehow, he managed to shake up his high school sandwich routine when he shifted from bologna and cheese to peanut butter. Shudders.

I’m the complete opposite.  While I welcome leftovers and I love the “prepare once, eat twice” or more principle, I don’t like eating the same dishes over and over.  Maybe that’s why I love to cook so much.  I enjoy trying new recipes, but only if they turn out. That’s fair, though?  Ingredients, even basic ones, are just too expensive to waste these days. Is it just me or have you noticed that many Facebook recipes seem to be missing a key ingredient, or quantities are off?  I’m still a bit peeved about the peanut butter ball recipe I tried that tasted like a glob of fat with a sprinkling of peanut butter.  As much as it pained me, those gobs of grossness went in the garbage.  Even the peanut butter king turned his nose up.  

I’ve never understood why anyone would leave out a key ingredient or direction – if you have a gift of baking or cooking, or any gift for that matter, why wouldn’t you share it? We’ve all heard of people that have perfected a “family recipe” but refused to pass it down. Some actually take it to their graves with them. I don’t get that. 

I’m often asked for recipes and I happily share. I take it as a huge compliment.

A few months ago, we took a step back in time to Kings Landing, the historic settlement near Fredericton, that offers a glimpse into life along the Saint John River Valley in the 19^th century. It was a great distraction from the hustle of modern day frenzy and offered a wonderful glimpse into simpler times. Beautiful but simple natural decorations, period costumes, as well as food demonstrations, recipes and samples were among the sights. At one of the homes available for viewing, two ladies baked a cake on the fireplace coals.  I looked around at the group of people gathered and many were mesmerized.  While it is incredible to imagine any type of meal preparation without our modern amenities like mixers, temperature control and timers, it appeared as though some of the guests had never seen food prepared from “scratch” before.  What a shame.  My fondest memories are usually centered around food.  But I am a foodie after all. 

The cake recipe from Kings Landing. The splatters tell me it’s well loved.

And by that, I mean, I prepare the comfort foods on which I grew up. I experiment with lots of recipes but there is comfort in nostalgia and right now in these turbulent times, I could use that.  

Our fast-paced world leaves most of us exhausted most of the time. Sometimes neither Chris nor I feel like cooking and my hubby’s dinner offer of a gourmet peanut butter sandwich with Concord grape jelly does not suffice. While I’d prefer to eat healthy food I’ve prepared every day, sometimes, it’s not the reality. There’s no shame in that in my opinion.  It’s okay to accept our limitations and not beat ourselves up for it. So we sometimes order takeout.

Each day begins with that dreaded question “I don’t know. What do you want for dinner?” until one of us dies.  It’s exhausting dreaming up food ideas and preparing grocery lists.

I know a lot of families have lost or given up on the art of cooking and spending time together in the kitchen. Somehow, we need to get back to healthier eating, better meal choices and gathering around the table to dine. More importantly, we need to slow down and talk with each other.  How often does that happen with busy families, or even our friends?  Parents are running kids from one activity to another in after school programs, but the family unit doesn’t spend any quality time together…unless you count the time in the backseat of the SUV while their kid is on their tablet or scrolling their phone.  Doesn’t togetherness count for something in this world anymore?

Like it or not, food brings people together.  We gather with food in times of celebration and in times of sadness.  Remember those dainty finger sandwiches lovingly prepared by senior ladies in the church for a gathering? Those rolled up asparagus and cheese sandwiches remain my absolute favourite.

Not so long ago, I loved to entertain.  It was pure joy to pour over recipes and pair foods for a palate pleasing meal.  I loved to decorate the table, and bring out my special dishes.  But then I got tired and it became more chore than fun.  Pride, or something, stopped me from asking people to contribute to the meal. I refused their help when they offered.  I ended up doing it all myself, working myself to exhaustion and then feeling resentful.  That wasn’t on them.  It was entirely on me.  I’ve always struggled to ask for help. But I’m working on that. Delicious meals have been harder to come by in this household since burnout – I’m not as creative in the kitchen and with low energy and cognitive issues, I have to embrace simplicity.  But I’m optimistic this will pass.

One of my fondest memories of food and friends was a weekend in a rented cabin when we decided to make fresh pasta from scratch.  I’d never tried to make pasta because I assumed it was too difficult.  Surprisingly, it wasn’t hard.  It was easy to form the ingredients of flour, eggs, olive oil, and salt.  We had to improvise to roll out the pasta since a KitchenAid pasta attachment wasn’t likely to be found. After searching the kitchen drawers for something remotely resembling a rolling pin, we grabbed a wine bottle. With gentle pressure and patience, the pasta was molded into the desired shape to be flattened and cut into strips.  Then it was draped to dry for a bit. Everyone took a turn, as we laughed and chatted away.  It was the most delicious pasta I ever had.  Good times don’t get much better than that. And all it took was 4 basic ingredients, improvisation and willing hands.

The same friends joined us at our home for my delicious seafood casserole on Christmas Eve. It’s a tradition – the casserole is a combination of shrimp, scallops and lobster in a creamy sauce with sautéed mushrooms, celery and onions. My sister-in-law Helen delivers seafood from Nova Scotia to ensure I get the freshest available. It’s rich – on my wallet and on the palate – but we enjoyed it immensely – like every year.  Everything in moderation, I say.

As we savored the wonderful meal of pomegranate salad with candied nuts, garlic toast and seafood, her husband asked “Why do we save all these delicious recipes for a holiday?”   Don’t tell him this – because we like to spar a lot – but I agree with him. Why do we save special recipes for special occasions?

Maybe we need to treat every meal like a special occasion.  We might not need to pull out Grandma’s china or Mom’s silverware and spread out a white tablecloth with fresh flowers unless we want to. But what if we set a goal, even once a week, for a leisurely meal – to be prepared and enjoyed together? 

You may have noticed on my Facebook and Instagram page that I share the occasional food photo.  My friend Joanne reminded me that I take my cooking gift for granted.  I’d never thought of it that way to be honest but she’s right. I’ll try harder to post some photos.  Like many of you, I’m tired, my energy lags and it can be a complete drag some nights to think of what’s for dinner. But I know the importance of healthy eating especially for burnout recovery.  When you eat better, you feel better. 

After all, food IS life.

A sure sign of spring! I tried to capture my own photo of the red wing blackbirds at our feeder but they flew off before I got the chance. Thanks to Laura Nijssen for this photo.

And we’ll end with a little tune from Canadian folk-singer David Francey who’s accompanied by Chris Murphy. See you next Saturday!

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